Men are dogs

Men are dogs...

Dogs are kind, loyal, empathetic, and affectionate. Are men really like dogs? I would say men are more like the male of any form of any sentient being (must be aware of pleasure and pain). Let's explore this question a little further. I would venture out to hypothesize that: The sense of compassion and interconnectedness with others is not as strong in male species as it is within females.

An experiment done with the macaque monkey population can bring us to an understanding of this phenomena. It was arranged so that when a monkey pulled a chain, it got food. But everytime it pulled the chain...another monkey was shocked. The one who pulled the chain had to see the other monkey suffer because of the pulled chain. Some monkeys would starve themselves for days. If it was a familiar monkey, it would starve itself for longer periods of time. If it were a the same species, but not familiar, the time of starvation would be shorter. If it were a different kind of monkey, it would hesitate even less in pulling the chain.

Monkey's are compassionate when it comes to their own kind, but less so when they are not familiar. I believe that females of the species have a grander sense of oneness and interconnectedness which comes from the miracle of motherhood-- this a sense of compassion between mother and child. It takes an effort to try and think of other people as close to you, so that their suffering matters as much as your own. For mothers this is easy. A mother would not hesitate to sacrifice herself fo her offspring, even in birds.

In humans compassion is a cultivation of the mind, where you first have to admit the consequences of your actions (knowledge) and then you have to relate it to someone close to you. This is SO easy for females because we are all connected through the act of, or at least the possibility of giving birth. This takes internalization and constant reflection. Do-acknowledge-reflect-act.

Men are more like turtles. A turtle does not have the dependency on its mother from birth. It takes more effort to show affection and compassion for this creature because from birth, it maybe, was never given the chance to be dependent. Like when the mother says, "You are a big boy now". And holds the child at a distance, if the child hasn't finished the bonding period and healthfully let go then this becomes a constant and ever present fear--abandonment.

SO when you hear the phrase, "Men are like dogs". You can say, "Nah, they're more like turtles"

You have a right with me.

Soft tears of new found needs, or buried words of contempt.
I am not disgusted by your worry warts.
The quiet strength you carry can become a weakness if you let it.
It's okay with me.
You have a right with me.
You're emotional episodes can go in my collection of precious keepsakes.
They'll be safe.
I will keep this delicately.
Let loose those silent cries,
my ears are big enough hold them all.
reasons don't matter here.
Not at all...
like you, just you, just how you do.
That's all that matters.
Your most authentic self, in all its lights and shadows.
that's what I am with you,
You have a right with me.

I love therefore I am…

When I was a little girl I never played with Barbie or Ken…not because I was socially conscious at that age. But mainly due to practical reasons their cost and dimensions, they were too tall to fit into the narrow Payless shoe boxes that would be converted into condominiums. There were also a little too standard. Not like the trolls. The trolls came alive in a unique way, each effectively transformed into a miniature character that strolled around in the shoebox/condos and interacted with a family of individual troll relations. When I was a little girl I teamed with my older sister to create the troll colony.
We played with the trolls, but before long the trolls took on their own lives and played themselves. We had a few at first…they slowly picked up in number and a family was started. Eventually they gained neighbors and sparks flew between a few as multitudes of troll love connections were made. I remember playing with these treasure trolls with scrunched up faces, olive skin, and jewels in their bellies. I loved them, the way the reflected happiness so brightly.
My sister and I must have played with these trolls for years there were generations of trolls and they each had their own individual story and character history. They had condos made out of shoe boxes and each of them had interior decorations unique from the next. They had livelihoods, though I can't remember what those were. They were kind of like the desperate housewives, in that, you knew they were getting money from somewhere but that source was not clear and you couldn't really say that you care with all of the drama that went on between them being enough to focus on.
From the trolls with their elaborate lives to where I stand today, I see myself as a dreamer. When I have a dream, I follow it. All the way—and that has gotten me in a lot of trouble at times and other times it has worked out but either way I have learned a lot about myself. One thing I can’t do is I can not not follow my heart. I am so passionate that when I feel for a cause or a person I feel completely and with every morsel of my being. For that reason I take my time in expressing myself. Sometimes I take so long in expressing myself that everyone has left the room and gone home to their families and I am still sitting there thinking about how I can express myself…and the answer has always been, with written words. I take forever to think of how I want to say something but when it finally comes out it is exactly the way I intend. I revel in choosing my words one by one.
In summary, I am a walking contradiction. I love people. I’m antisocial. I follow my love for life. I’m scared to make the final step. I am experienced. I have a lot to learn about love, about people. I don’t take well to no. I am half man and half woman. I live in extremes. I feel people’s emotions deeply but I am not sympathetic. I create wherever I go. I cherish precious moments. My favorite ice cream is mint n’chip. I eat an enormous amount of chocolate on a daily basis. I run. I cherish perspectives. I write. I live.