I am not in a nutshell

I am a divine necessity,
an eternal seeker,
and a self-proclaimed knuckle head.

I never take the right advice
I will not spend the rest of my life counting down until Friday.

I love blasphemously
and eat like I know not the day nor the hour.

Loving you is weeeeeeeee!!!

I love you with something natural in me...
like a cool breeze,
the touch of you caresses my skin.
Far away in body but one in body and spirit.
You make my body more.
You make my heart move.
Bigger than what my thoughts can make me.
You support God's purpose in me.
Loving you is easy,
something like looking at the sea.
Living in synchrony with the sun and sand.
Swimming toward your soul, I meet my own.

Sometimes, I feel like a pea.

Sometimes...

When you say you love me, I feel so good.
But when I realize you praise another woman as highly. I question, why, when you have me?
How can you tell another...her 'smile can steal your heart'.
Your words are like darts.
Can I trust you?
When you say you love, I feel like it's with half a heart.
When you lust after others.
Spill intimate words of passion shared most often between lovers.
Your heart, mind, soul, body are all connected.
God did not separate one from the other.
When you give away one in lust all is lost.
It takes a little away from me and we.
I feel that knot in my throat, the heaviness in my heart and pit of me.
When you say you...those are just words now.
Like a mosquito buzzing by me.
Cheapened, you make this, we.

You see no wrong which makes it worse. Like a nightmare where only I can see.

And awaken feeling wronged and alone.

Beneath trust;
Why must you use lovers words with another? What of me? Is nothing sacred?

Heartmindbody. Are those conneceted, when you say you love me?

When you...it is stained.
By your indecency.
Me in my world,
You in yours.
Me in my world, alone.